I blame it on the White House Chef.

Saturday morning should have started with a hot breakfast, but it didn’t. The President woke up tweeting over-the-top accusations against his predecessor, whose legitimacy (“not born in the U.S.A.”) he had spent a fortune to undermine, the black one whose two terms were without scandal. Suddenly, before breakfast arrived, the former President had become Nixon and Watergate and all things “sick” and “bad”.

Bugged by President Trump’s outrageous claims, FBI Director Comey immediately demanded that the Justice Department issue a statement that President Trump’s claim about Trump tower being bugged has no basis in fact. The Justice Department, led by Attorney General Jeff Sessions whose unexpected recusal from the Justice Department’s investigation of alleged Russian interference in the 2016 election had just infuriated the President, denied the FBI Director’s request.

The President is out of control – his own or anyone else’s. His fears, imagination, and impulses control him. Someone in the White House needs to tell the White House Chef to bring him his favorite breakfast at 5:00 a.m. before he turns the world upside down with over-the-top conspiratorial tweets or, instead, uses the nuclear codes to one-up Kim Jong Un.

Monday, March 6,  the six Monday of  A.T.* 1, the whole world depends on the White House Chef and kitchen.

*Anno Trump

  • Gordon C. Stewart, eating my Wheaties, the Breakfast of  Champions, Chaska, MN, March 6, 2017.



Breaking the fast

Another versified look into the private life of Steve Shoemaker:

“What I Carry from the Kitchen Each Morning”

–2 boxes of cereal under my left arm
–1 large glass glass between 2 fingers & thumb of left hand
–1 gallon of 2% milk by the handle with remaining 2 fingers of that hand
–With my right hand, 1 bowl containing a spoon & 4 pills
on a plate with a table-knife balanced precariously on the edge
–1 piece of buttered toast atop the bowl
–a jar of red raspberry preserves clutched between right forearm & where my waist used to be
–An eagerness to break my fast

Steve: Sounds like you’re pretty well-waisted even before you break the fast. Maybe a sequel verse for full-disclosure…about the rest of the meal – the stack of pancakes or the waffles, the half-pound of bacon, the maple syrup, the butter, and the three-cheese omelet.