Grandpa, Do we conceal and carry?

Grandpa, do we conceal and carry?

Well, sometimes Grandma and I carry your bottle when Mom’s away, but we have no need to conceal it. Why?

I’m not talking about bottles, Grandpa. I’m talking about guns. Do we conceal and carry guns?

n_msnbc_brk_douglasteacher_180214_1920x1080.nbcnews-ux-1080-600We don’t, Elijah. We don’t carry guns and, if we did, we wouldn’t conceal them. We like to be open. People who conceal things have something to hide.

That’s not what people in Congress are saying! They think everyone should conceal and carry. Grandpa, do I have to go to school?

Yes. When you’re older you’ll go to school. You have to. Every child in America has to go to school.

I don’t want to!

Sure you do. It’s just like daycare but you’ll be older.

School’s aren’t not like daycare, Grandpa. I saw it on the news. All those kids in Florida got killed. Kids shouldn’t have to go to school. They’re not safe. That’s why the NRA wants conceal and carry to protect us from the bad people.

Okay, now I’m getting your drift. This is really sad. 

Yeah! If I have to go to school, I want to conceal and carry!

Hmmm. I see. You think your school will be safer if everyone conceals and carries so you can get the bad guys.

Right. Exactly. I’m not a Democrat any more. I’m a Republican!

I see. That’s your right under the Constitution.

Yeah! I’m going to exercise my Second Amendment rights!

Well, let’s stop and think about this before we decide to carry anything but your bottle. The Second Amendment isn’t the only right in the Bill of Rights. If we keep going the way we’re going, the Second Amendment will be the only part of the Constitution left. America will become a mass firing range.


Grandpa, that’s awful! Can I please have my bottle before I open my lemonade stand?

  • Gordon C. Stewart, Chaska, MN, February 15, 2018.


This entry was posted in America, Family, Life, Social Commentary, Uncategorized and tagged , by Gordon C. Stewart. Bookmark the permalink.

About Gordon C. Stewart

I've always liked quiet. And, like most people, I've experienced the world's madness. "Be Still! Departure from Collective Madness" (Wipf and Stock Publishers, Jan. 2017) distills 47 years of experiencing stillness and madness as a campus minister and Presbyterian pastor (IL, WI, NY, OH, and MN), poverty criminal law firm executive director, and social commentator. Our dog Barclay reminds me to calm down and be much more still than I would be without him.

14 thoughts on “Grandpa, Do we conceal and carry?

  1. Americans should only be as stalwart about other amendments! We seem pretty slippery about the first, for example. And how about Civil Right? A little wonky there too. We might have yet one MORE slave result as America grows weary of being permanently under the thumb of the rich, powerful, and plutocratic. We may not yet be slaves, but it seems we are working on it.


  2. Oh, Elijah. Auntie Barbara here. I read all the stories your Grandpa shares here. I was sad and worried all day yesterday about the school shooting. When I was in school to become a minister, I had to take a course to learn to be a good minister to people who were really , really sick or injured. My “classroom” was a nearby hospital that had a special place for people with really bad injuries, like gunshots. I spent time with family members who were really worried and scared. Many of these badly injured folks died in spite of how good our doctors and nurses were. And their families were SO very sad. When I hear of terrible news like yesterday’s school shooting, I feel so sad and sorry for Mommas and Dads and all those who are now so sad. So today I am sad for all the students and families. So, Elijah, no guns. Not now, not ever.


    • Dear Auntie Barbara,

      These things confuse a liddle guy like me. I’ve never been in a classroom, though I was in the hospital when I was borned. I’m glad you were in the hospital, too, to help all those sad people. I don’t want to send people to the hospital or make Mommas and Daddies cry. I’ll talk with Grandpa after he gives me my bottle.


  3. It’s a sad state of affairs, isn’t it Gordon? And if I hear one more politician offer the lame platitude of ‘hopes and prayers for the victims’ and thinking that will suffice, I think *I* will scream…. We need to address this issue and soon….


  4. According to what I heard on Don Lemon on CNN, you have to be 21 to buy a handgun, but you can buy the kind that killed 17 students yesterday if you are 18. I cited my source, ’cause who knows, I may be wrong. But if I’m right, it’s more of the craziness. Maybe we should have a law that you can carry a gun only if you can conceal it? (ok, tongue in cheek — sort of). I’m sure our founding father’s didn’t have in mind the kind of firearms that are available today. Oh shucks! Why bother. I’ve driven past the huge NRA campus…


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